When Guilt Grows Up
There is something happening to us gals that we need to talk about. An epidemic happening to women all over. There's a chance you too have been plagued. This pathogenic like epidemic sucks the life force out of us, and is affecting more woman than men, and giving us an unfair disadvantage when it comes to leveling up.
Susan Carrell, author of Escaping Toxic Guilt, said: ‘Women feel guilt when they don’t think they are being good enough in their various roles – especially as wife, mother and daughter.
‘That’s because familial, cultural and religious tenets teach women that being “good” is the most important thing.
‘When a woman feels she is not putting another first, she quickly feels like she’s doing something bad, then guilt rushes in.’
Though sometimes guilt can guide us and teach us
When you are working on your business do you feel guilt because the house is out of order?
Do you feel torn between playing with the kids or meeting a deadline?
If you are good at managing feelings of guilt it's a good sign that you are able to manage priorities and balance your time.
If you regularly feel guilty when others call on you or when you are presented with multiple options than you are more likely to feel drained from not being able to focus and build energy around your business tasks.
There is hope though, if you can figure out where this guilt is rooted, there is a good chance that you will see your productivity and energy spike as long as you take action. * IF THIS IS YOU CLICK HERE NOW
How Influenced By Guilt Are You?
THE GUILT HIGH ADDICTION
I think it's about time that we talk about something.
I think you have a problem.
I think you are addicted to guilt. You get a high off it, and you're addicted to it. There I said it.
This is your intervention.
But Elle, what are you talking about? I hate guilt. Guilt sucks. Why would I get a high off of guilt?
Let me explain. See I do it too, so here's what happens for me.
In the morning I sit at my desk. I start working on an important work project. Just as I'm getting in my work flow this sweet little girl comes waltzing in, toys in arms, and wanting to play. She'll tug at my arm and beg.
And beg, and beg, and beg.
Next thing you know it's 2:30PM and I'm still playing hide go seek with this tiny human who seems to think I won't find her behind the curtain after the 18th time hiding there.
Do you know why this happens?
It's because when we cave, and succumb to the needs of another we feel philanthropic. We feel like a martyr. We foolishly believe we will regret not caring for SOMEONE or SOMETHING else first then accept our own personal losses.
It's easy to do, but here's the real problem.
When our life and plans fail we can at least say we weren't to blame. It's because everyone else! It's not our fault right? *eyeroll. WRONG. You are not too busy caring for our families, our friends, our work, our blah blah blah. You are too busy not prioritizing.
Don't let yourself feel the high from guilt relief. INSTEAD stick with your priorities and FEEL GOOD about doing that!
STICK WITH YOUR PLANS
FEEL GOOD ABOUT DOING THAT
Block out time for YOU in your schedule the same way you block out time for others.
If you mark " Dinner with Kris @ 5:15" in your planner, or "Take kids to the pool" on your calendar then you better damn well be putting "Read Book, and Meditate" and "Finish Project" on your schedule too!
Not doing so, does no one any favors.
ARE YOU A MAGIC GENIE?
If you're always putting everyone else and their wishes first you know where your wishes and needs come? Need I say more?
So why do we do this. See the thing is, this isn't new. It's not the first time you've thought about it but it's never the last time you do it either.
The difference between a successful person who loves their life and gets fufillment out of everyday is they know the right things to do AND they do it!
You are not a magic genie, it is not your job to grant people wishes and you know what? Even genies set limits on wishes so you should be to!